Match Report!!Sunday 02nd February
University Strollers 1Lion Sports 2

If you will excuse the analogy - any visitor to the STD clinic will tell you “it’s the result that matters” and this was definitely the case for the mighty lions as they ground out a crucial victory over bogey side Strollers.
A win really was imperative to continue with their push for a top three finish, and a European place next season. So with the icey wind welcoming the players into the arena, the Orange clad sporting troubadours set about entertaining the die hard supporters with their usual brand of footballing storytelling.
The game began well for Lions, with good early possession, yet they were unable to convert the chances that came their way. As a result of this frustration, the usual creative West Byfleet outfit began over elaborating, trying to thread slide rule passes instead of staying patient in their build up.
With the back three relatively untroubled, there should have been ample opportunity for the midfield to make their mark, but the ball was treated like a Spud U Like special, spending more time in the air than at the feet of the playmakers.
Hence, the scores remained at 0 – 0 and it was an unhappy gaffer at half time, with every player well aware that they were nor performing to their capabilities. A time for contemplation was called for before returning to the field of play, with each player encouraged to dig deep in their minds and use their own intellect to ponder the problems and set about restoring the usual attractive style of play.
So, two seconds later Gordy and Danny were ready to restart.
The second half began in more promising fashion, with Rory “Jalfresi” O’Keeffe staring to pull a few strings, and Greg “TIT” Burton giving the Strollers left back a torrid time. Sure enough, the pressure eventually told when Mat “CIE” Gibbs was crudely upended in the box and a penalty was instantly awarded. Sam “Thumb” Johnson coolly despatched the spot kick into the bottom corner, giving the Lions the lead they so desired.
More chances came and went, leaving the nagging fear of Strollers snatching an equaliser – Ground Hog Day for most of this squad who know too well the dangers of not consolidating the advantage.
Well, well, well – have a guess at what happened next then readers? No, 50’s didn’t stop the game to check his reflection, and no Danny didn’t pause to contemplate the technological advances in store for the next millennia.
Yep, that’s it – Uni scored. Ask Denzil “FP” Guy how chuffed he was to be beaten by Darren Hill straight form a corner with 5 minutes to go. Enough said.
So, character in the highest degree was now called for, and suck me dry and call me dusty, the boys from the Theatre didn’t disappoint. With no heads hanging, an assault was rained on the Strollers goal, but it all appeared to be to no avail as the clock ticked away – but wait, who was that figure floating into the penalty area unmarked – yes it was Colin “The Count” MacDonald. His right foot shot was saved, but Greg "TIT" Burton folloewd in to welly the ball home.
Phew!
The Lions held out for the crucial win, and keep up their charge in the league.
Not the prettyest performance by a long chalk, but a win's a win and not to be sniffed at.

Comedy moments :

a) Denz and Chinners failintg to keep out their goal.
b) Their centre forward getting slightly narked with Les.