Reunion weekend
We have learned that the weekend of the 6th September is also the ‘Maritime Festival’ weekend in Great Yarmouth, so there will be plenty of activities to interest us, plus some interesting ship’s in the harbour, including a couple of Royal Naval Patrol Boats, we are not sure yet whether The Mayor will be able to attend, given, what presumably, will be a busy weekend for him/her.
We have also (Thanks to Tony David) now got an after dinner speaker (Frank Moxon senior member of the RNLI) who will give us a short talk on the RNLI, Frank has visited our web-site so he does have an idea of Vidal’s activities during her years in commission.
Tony will also be collecting for the RNLI (London Branch) during the weekend.
Unfortunately our President, Sir David, will be unable to attend this year due to a prior engagement, I know I speak for everyone when I say we will miss his presence.
We are still looking for a Saturday lunchtime cheaper drinking venue.
Subs for 2008
Thanks to all those who have sent in their subs for this year, the accounts are now beginning to look healthier, we still, however, have only 47 members who have paid, a poor show out of 200 registered members (Some haven’t paid for three of four years so we do not send out to them).
The VIDAL Shield
We understand that the Shield is the VIDAL family ‘Coat-of-Arms’, and is an Egret clutching a Gold Nugget, we have passed this information on, and the information, plus this photo, is now on the web-site.
And Finally
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic; simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.
4. High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a while thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
5. A mousetrap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.7. Have a bad toothache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will forget about the toothache.
8. Be really good to your family and friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.
9. If you have a bad headache put your head through the nearest glass window and the pane will go.
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mum.'
He said. “I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it”.
She said. “You wear pants don't you?”
He said, “Shall we try swapping positions tonight”?
She said. “That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa”.
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says: "So you would love her."
But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
God says: "So she would love you."
Hillbilly Duck Hunter
A hillbilly went hunting one day in Kentucky and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home when he was confronted by an ornery game warden that didn't like hillbillies.
The game warden ordered the hillbilly to show his hunting license.
The hillbilly pulled out a valid Kentucky hunting license.
The game warden looked at the license, then reached over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed its butt, and said, 'This duck ain't from Kentucky . This is a Tennessee duck. You got a Tennessee huntin' license, boy?'
The hillbilly reached into his wallet and produced a Tennessee hunting license.
The game warden looked at it, then reached over and grabbed the second duck, sniffed its butt , and said, 'This ain't no Tennessee duck. This duck's from Mississippi. You got a Mississippi license?'
The hillbilly reached into his wallet and produced a Mississippi hunting license.
The warden then reached over and picked up the third duck, sniffed its butt, and said, 'This ain't no Mississippi duck. This here duck's from South Carolina. You got a South Carolina huntin' license?'
Again the hillbilly reached into his wallet and brought out a South Carolina hunting license.
The game warden was extremely frustrated at this point, and he yelled at the hillbilly, 'Boy, just where the hell are you from?'
The hillbilly turned around, dropped his pants, bent over, and said, 'You tell me. You're the expert'
A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."
The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"
A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the restroom. A few moments later a loud, blood, curdling scream is heard coming from the restroom.
A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar.
The bartender goes to the restroom door to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there?" he yells. "You're scaring the customers."
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet," slurs the drunk, “and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my testicles!"
With that, the bartender opens the door and says,
"You idiot!! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
